Yea, What She Said

Sometimes I struggle to find the right words for the things I want to communicate. I've been known to verbally vomit (especially when I have been drinking or thinking too much) and everything comes out all wrong. I mean, even when I am super articulate I wonder if the audience really understands my intention. I think that's why I love music, poetry, books, and good friends so much.

There have been times when I have heard a song and physically had to sit down because the lyrics destroyed me. They could have been my own. Did the writer feel just like me? I mean EXACTLY like me? I sure hope so. It allows me to believe that I am not crazy; none of us are. It even makes me believe that there is a beautiful way to express just about anything.

Then there are times when words aren't needed. Maybe it's unexpected homemade cookies to cheer you up, an anonymous (and, incidentally, perfect) birthday gift, a look across the room, someone brushing your hair out of your face while you're talking, a friend's kiss on the cheek, or a hug that neither of you want to end. Sometimes you just get it. No words required.

I like it when that happens. People are good. Real life is good.

If the Brakeman Turns My Way
by Bright Eyes
When panic grips your body
And your heart's a hummingbird
Raven thoughts blacken your mind
'Til you're breathing in reverse
All your friends and sedatives mean well
But make it worse
Every reassurance just magnifies the doubt
Better find yourself a place to level out

Got a cricket for a conscience
Always looks the other way
A cocaine soul starts seeming like
An empty cabaret
Hey, where have all the dancers gone?
Now the music doesn't play
Tried to listen to the river
But you couldn't shut your mouth
Better take a little time to level out

I never thought of running
My feet just led the way

Mixed-up signals
Bullet train
Cars are switched out in the crazy rain
I could meet you any place
If the brakeman turns my way

All this automatic writing
I have tried to understand
From a psychedelic angel
Who was tugging on my hand
It's an infinite coincidence
But it doesn't form a plan
So I'm headed for New England
Or the Paris of the South
Gonna find myself somewhere to level out

Are your brothels full, oh Babylon
With merry middlemen?
Never peer out of their periscopes
From those deep opium dens
All this death must need a counterweight
Always someone born again
First a mother bathes her child
Then the other way around
The scales always find a way to level out

I tried to pass for nothing
But my dreams gave me away

Mixed-up signals
Bullet train
People snuffed out in the brutal rain
I could live to any age
If the brakeman turns my way

It is an old world, it's hard to remember
Like a dime store mystery
I'm a repeat first-time offender
Who has rewritten history

Mixed-up tea leaves
Phantom pain
Fuzzy logic in the the crazy rain
Getting better every day
If the brakeman turns my way

Mixed-up signals
Bullet train
Cars are switched out in the blinding rain
He'll be smiling as he seals my fate
When the brakeman turns my way

Bright Eyes : If the Brakeman Turns My Way