I know I am dead because I am in heaven. I know because three things have made me insanely happy today. I need you guys to stick with me on this one. I'll keep it short.
Numba One: Gina.
Listening to her voice message from last night on my way to work this morning was the first time I've cried from laughing. Tears. Real tears. Not, "stop it, I'm crying" tears. Real, sniffling, wet, tears coming down my cheeks from her comedy. I love her. So much.
Numba Two: This is for Karma.
It reminds me of her... because I think I am having an overdose and dying and need her help. And if you don't immediately go here and watch "it", you will regret it for the rest of your lives. I Think We're Dead.
Numba Three: This is for me.
I re-read one of the best texts I've received recently. Well, maybe the best ever.
Him: By the way: Regarding my reply earlier, "I'm so sorry for everything" ...repeat four times.....
And THIS is for all of you because, just like I told Him, "Baby, we'll be fine."
And I think we're dead.
A) I love that I am being referred to as Karma. B) I've had the call from many a pothead, shroomhead, or otherhead 'splaining the levels of trippyness and soforth...and finally 3)I snarfed immediatley after hearing the newsanchor snarf - its like trying not to laugh in church. Incredible...:)
ReplyDeletePS, I must always remeber to ask the dying if they are feeling feverish. I HATE being hot when I'm dead!
ReplyDeleteNo lie this is the call I just took...
ReplyDelete"CHP with a transfer. Bill's on the line with a house full of poisonous snakes."
"Hi Bill, this is 911, what's going on?"
(long/pause)............................................................................................................................................"There's black glow-in-the dark snakes everywhere."
"Ok, Bill, have you taken any drugs today?"
(long pause)................................"I smoked a lil' and I had a "sip" of a drink."
I think he was dying cause every answer he gave me seemed to go by really, really, really slow.
hahhahahahha!!!!!
ReplyDeletethat is why i love you and knew you would appreciate this!
i CANNOT believe that really happened. shit. i hope no snakes get into my bed tonight.
haha